Loves Puppies

I love.  I love all.  I have this desire in my heart to hope that everyone is okay.  I know that’s not acceptable.  I know that’s not gonna happen.  That causes me anxiety.  Somehow the music died.

BTW will you all save me?

 

Social Vibe Widget

I just want to take a second to mention my Social Vibe widget on my side bar. It’s free to use, all you have to do is click it, pick your favorite baseball or football card out of the one’s they have and that’s it. It helps benefit the mentally ill, alcoholics and addicts with a telephone hotline they can call to get emergency help. Please do click on it, it takes 1 minute of your time and it’s absolutely free! Seriously FREE!

Thank you for your participation!

Vin Diesel

Just wanted to try out the adding a video so chose HIM!

Do Something, Damn It!

So after this mornings fiasco, I was lucky because my son actually wanted to take a nap!  He’s 3 and hasn’t taken a nap since he was about 2, we cut nap time out for him because if he does take a nap then he’s up until about 11 or 12 so I’ve just been dealing with the very long days with him.  I know, I know he’s going to be but that’s okay, I really needed a nap.  However, I wake up from my nap sick to my stomach and shaky as hell, my mind is humming and I’m still just so exhausted.  I haven’t accomplished anything on my todo list today and I know my hubby is just so sick of me being like this, I’m sure he’d love to actually have a ‘normal’ mom for his kids instead of the insanity I bring to the table.  I know I’m sick of the insanity I’m bringing to the table.  I guess I should make myself do something, anything.

WHY?!?

I give up!  I’m officially throwing my hands in the air and just giving up.  I sware there is some unseen force, spirit or entity that doesn’t want me to get better, that doesn’t want me to get treatment for my bipolar or even alcoholism.  The alcoholism I can take at this point on my own but I NEED help with my other diagnosis, Bipolar.  Upon receiving our information about payment into our Cobra Health Insurance, I decided I needed to call to check the status and find out what I need to do to get to a psychiatrist to get back on meds and finally put some of my horror at rest.  Well I’ve discovered that I am paying for health insurance I can’t afford to even use, our deductible is so high that I can not at this moment afford to pay to go to the doctor so I’m paying out of pocket for health insurance that’s pointless to us.  Oh and of course the deductible for any medications is also so high that I wouldn’t beable to actually pay for any prescriptions to get them filled.  This is pointless and ridiculous!  I’m sick of everyday have to be beaten down once again to this low point, only to wake up yet again to something else to have to deal with.  I can no longer keep doing this.  I’m so depressed now that I don’t know, I just give up!  Luckily there is no alcohol around because I just want to be numb at this point.