Monday, Wednesday, and Friday

Yup.  Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.  That seems to be the sentence.  I go to meetings that last three hours long and by the first hour I’m pretty much humbled beyond humbled.  The county I reside in to get mental health help has said in order to seek out help (which I still have to wait until March 29th to see a doctor) I have to go to SAIOP (Substance Abuse Intensive Outpatient Participation).  I’m humbled because there are twenty people there including me, I’m the only one not homeless.  I was asked by someone in the group, “Seriously, what do you have to be anxious enough or panicked enough to want to drink over?”

So damn true.  Compared to everyone else there…so damn true.

I am humbled.

But yet I still have a life-threatening illness.

Sigh.  I needed to come here even though I’ve been told by the counselor that this is not the right place to be.

I’m glad I have this place and I am sorry that my rock bottom isn’t as dramatic as others but it is my rock bottom.

My name is Bats and I am an alcoholic and bipolar woman.