My Brother is Alive

First off, my brother is alive and hungry; the man hasn’t eaten anything since Saturday so maybe they’ll allow him to eat today but we’ll see.  I talked with him yesterday and he’s very alert to what is going on, he told me the detective was coming up to give him back his wallet and it’s contents.  We were very worried about that, among other things but he needs his identification and it was important to him so it’s important to me.  We were worried that his wife may have it and if that’s the case then he’d never get it back.

Anyway, I’ve learned a few things over the past few days…

There are evil people in the world and when I say evil, I mean EVIL.  People who say they live the word and life of God and then turn around and wish death upon another human being.

There are people out there that NEED drama in their lives and drama like this is something that makes me want to explode emotionally but to them this is their dream come true.

People on Facebook even though they don’t know the facts of such a violent act will support you even if you are slandering and lying about it.  I’ve watched people put things like “KILL HER LOL” in response to my 12-year-old niece saying she wants to teach me a lesson.  And to the person who put that, yeah pretty damn laugh out loudable.

Anyway…my brother was told this will go to the grand jury and we shall she.  The good thing is the detective told him he can leave and they will contact him if they need any information and when he needs to appear for court.

And now I have one question and pardon me if this sounds stupid as hell or if it seems logical but who the hell carries a gun around in their pocket?

My Brother Has Been Shot

Tonight my life stood still.

At exactly 10:58pm I received a message on my phone from my dearest Dad…

” Honey, you need to call me back.  Your brother’s situation has gotten worst and it’s not good.  Not good at all.”

I called back.

See, my brother has been living in hell for 13 or some years now with a wife and his children.  My brother just recently had to quit from being a coal miner in Alabama because he was told to.  He was told to either quit or be fired; my brother has never been fired from anything in his life.  He was told to quit because he is an addict, he’s addicted to Oxycontin.  He’s a great man.  Next to my Dad, he’s my hero.  I would give my soul to be like him.


My brother has been shot by his wife’s father.  See in the South it’s okay to shoot an unarmed man.  A man who just wants to not live in hell.

He is now in critical condition and is in surgery.

I will not sleep tonight and I pray for justice in the South.  I will SEE to justice for this crime.

You DO NOT shoot an unarmed man.

It’s Friday & “Perplexed” Says Bats

I think I was somewhere around 8-10 years old when I realized that our family wasn’t the happy, functional family that lived on the corner.  I didn’t know the word for it was dysfunctional until a couple years later but we have to be the most dysfunctional family on Earth, well right next to the Dahmer family.  When I started drinking at 12, it felt good to stop the thoughts and worry about why our family was the way it was.  There was no communication other than violence, no kind words or touches, no praise; only jealousy, hatred, and sickness of the mind.  We literally couldn’t stand being near each other or even to hear voices of each of us.

A few days ago I got a call from my Dad.  The words will ring in my years until the day that I die.

Has anyone told you that your brother had to be transported to the hospital for what we have been tiptoeing around for way too many years?

About 10 years ago my brother broke his leg in such a way that I couldn’t believe the man could function with the pain even just to be flown to the nearest hospital.  He was prescibed painkillers and still is.

 Now if you are an alcoholic or an addict (which I think of those as the same diseases), you know that they don’t start off slow; they can overtake your body, soul, mind, and heart at a rapid pace.  Their only purpose to us is to take us to a darkness that we never knew existed, to lie to us, to kill us.  It’s very important to understand that addiction will kill us, not only our bodies but also our souls.


No Dad, nobody has let me know anything.  I need information, I need to figure out how I can help.  IT’S going to kill him, Dad.

Apparently this has nothing to do with addiction but actually with a blood pressure medication, now this is my brothers version of what has happened and keep in mind he’s the addict so think of the most self-centered, conniving, lying bastard ever.  Every word that comes out of his mouth is going to be a lie, an exaggeration, and a ploy. 

My blood pressure meds made me passout four different times so my wife after the fourth time called for transport.  I must have taken the prescription wrong or they must have wrote it wrong.

No, actually what is going on is that he’s passed the line of defense when it comes to this insidious disease.  He’s now in the death mode, rock bottom needs to come now before it’s too late and the disease takes him from life.  I’m not sure how to help him or even if I should.  See, the one thing I am sure of is that help is going to do no good if he doesn’t want it.  All I need is that one thought to appear in his brain, that one thought that says:

Enough is enough.  I can do this no longer.

That thought doesn’t have to stay there, it can come and go just as fast but it has to be there for just one instance before I can put any plans into motion of making him fall flat on his face and hit his rock bottom.  I will not allow his rock bottom to be death.  I will save his life.  What perplexes me is; what if I can’t?