I am so nervous! Today is the training day ; it’s 5 o’clock in the morning, I’m trying to chug a cup of joe, get the kids up, dressed, eaten and ready, meanwhile I’m doing flip flops in my stomach about this class but I keep telling myself that anyone can endure this for 4 or 5 hours. I’ve just made myself such an isolated person over the past few years that I don’t know how to act or how I WILL act. I currently don’t own any business casual clothes so I’m hoping not everyone will be dressed for success, because I sure in hell won’t be.
Even with all of these unknown feelings inside me, curiousity is still there. Yes curiousity and excitement. I know it’s not a huge job but with some extra money we just might make it, we just might be okay. I’ve watched all of the parents enjoy leaving for vacation with their kids, coming home with tans, the kids enjoying new toys and new clothes; I swear I don’t know how all of these parents have the money to do anything! I especially don’t know how my daughters best friend in the neighborhood has the money they do. They are a one income family, the dad is a stay at home Dad (SAHD) but still new car, new refridgerator, new toys every weekend for their kids, new shoes, new clothes, new pets, this list could go on and on. My Dad would tell me “to stop keeping up with the Jones and worry about your own things.” and Dad is always right about these things so “I’m working on it Dad, I really am!”
Well it’s just about 5:30am so I need to go pound my joe and pace for 5 minutes before I get going. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!