Alcohol is an obsession. It’s ruining me. I can not control it, I can’t control the thoughts about it. I’m pretty positive alcohol will kill me, it’ll be the end to me. I don’t even enjoy drinking but the obsession runs so deep and intwined in me that I still do it. When I buy alcohol, I have a routine in putting it in the refridgerator, all the cans must be lined up, must face the same way. When I drink the alcohol, I have a routine with that also. There can never be one or two left, I must drink them all no matter how many are in there. The obsession runs so deep that I would rather sit, veg, drink alone than be out and about with life. Alcoholism will ruin me, it will take me down.
I have a lot to think about today before my kids come home.