I Want, I Need, I Can’t Have

So friday came and went, and well I didn’t drink but was up all night with thunderous thoughts racing around in my mind.  When I did fall asleep then my son woke me up, so had to try and fall back to sleep with no avail.  I sware I need sleep and it’s just not happening.  So at 4:30 this morning I’m watching Larry King Live about the Ms. California scandel.  Interesting view that she thinks she has been decrowned because of her view on same sex marriage, and it’s also interesting that they are saying she didn’t show up at events.  In my opinion, she answered that right, completely right.  If an event isn’t a scheduled event then why would she know about it or even have to show.  I wonder who schedules the events for her.  She also mentioned that she was told to do a Playboy event, and that she was appalled by this.  Who the hell scheduled that for a Ms. California????  Not that I think Playboy is horrible, I’m okay with Playboy but jeesh.  And then there is the Sarah Palin, Dave Letterman ‘thing’ going on….I have no clue what it’s about other than the fact that Letterman said something inappropriate about her 14 year old daughter.  Dave Letterman says a lot of inappropriate things about political figures and well poor Sarah Palin has been the brunt of it for quite awhile by all different people.  Hopefully things will subside down for her, unless of course she’s enjoying all of this.

Well my mother in law yesterday brought up the conversation once again about me smoking.  This time she wants me to quit on her birthday and added ‘for the rest of your life’ to the suggestion.  Someone needs to hand her a packet on One Day At A Time, and no it’s not going to be me.  I skirted around the subject and wouldn’t agree to anything because well I don’t want to quit damn it!  I’m very unhappy when I don’t smoke and yes I know all the reasons of why I should and all the information of how to, I’ve tried quitting now about oh 8 times and the longest I have gone was 6 weeks but by then life is treacherous and a bullet to my foot would feel better than quitting smoking.  So she’s disappointed in me, what’s new?  Right?  I always want to scream, YOU KNOW YOUR SON SMOKES ALSO,  LECTURE HIM DAMN IT!  But alas, I don’t and just try to remain call, and not agree to anything I don’t feel I can do or want to do.  But now they hold the we gave you all a car card, over our head.  I’ll give the damn thing back for a cigarette, HA! 

Can you tell I’m in a bad mood, and I’m not even PMSing!  I just want a damn drink.

One thought on “I Want, I Need, I Can’t Have

  1. Pingback: Pregnancy Dates Calculator

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