So it’s Friday. What does that mean exactly? The beginning of a weekend, non-stop kids, my hubby’s poker night, having to fix the fence, chores, more laundry. I’m hoping though that my study materials will come today so I can get started. If they do come, I can guarentee I won’t be drinking tonight but if not, well I’ll probably be waking up Saturday morning with a massive hangover. I don’t know what to do, I don’t want to drink but yet it’s the only thing right now that stops the panic, anxiety, worthless thoughts. And I know what everyone is thinking, why not hit a meeting? Well that would be a great idea but alas there aren’t any meetings near me that accept it if you bring children and I don’t have a babysitter. How about will power then? I do have some of that and maybe if I can get through tonight without a drink tomorrow after my hubby gets home in the afternoon, he can drive me to a meeting. I’ll have to ask. I’ll also look up some online meetings, see what I can find.
Okay so that’s my plan, spend the day recovering, fixing the fence, and then tonight doing whatever else I can not to drink. I just wish my panic attacks and anxiety would go away. Wish me luck!